The Etiquette of Spending the Night with Your Girl on the Side

Spending the night can be a big deal, especially to chicks. You might just think of it as convenient, or maybe it’s just hard because your wife is monitoring you ever move. Thing is, banging a chick and then sleeping over is not just another night. We have to admit, sharing a bed with someone else can be an intense thing, or it can just be a marriage of convenience. Either way, we have a few pointers about how to do this, and not ruin your marriage.

Is it practical, or is it emotional?

"Don't be emotional. Just do the deed and go away"

“Don’t be emotional. Just do the deed and go away”

Don’t spend the night with your girl on the side if it’s emotional. There’s a distinct difference here, and it’s not hard to tell. If the girl you’re banging look really longing or emotional, she’s going to read into you staying the night A LOT. Don’t do it, and in the process, you won’t send her the wrong message. It’s not like we want to hurt a chick’s feelings, but more importantly, avoid the drama! On the other hand, if a babe is so tired out from hooking up that she just immediately falls asleep and extends an offer for you to stay, it’s cool. The major thing to watch for here is that she’s more concerned with her own situation than yours, and trying to figure out whether she’s expecting anything.

Are you cuddling or sleeping?

"Something will definitely happen when you two are in the same bed"

“Something will definitely happen when you two are in the same bed”

When you wake up, assuming you spent the night in your girl’s bed and you’re already positive your wife won’t find out, are you cuddling or still snoring? Snoring is good, and a little cuddling is fine. You just banged her the night before – sure, who doesn’t like a little human contact? Here’s where things can get crazy, though. If you’re HOLDING her, you’re in trouble. Legit cuddling beyond fuzzy “we did each other last night” feelings is a recipe for disaster. Unless you’re ready to leave your wife, back off. Good signs include drawing attention to your morning wood and getting pissed that the sheets got pulled off you during the night. Bad signs are when you want to kiss her hair and whisper sweet nothings in her ear. Don’t go down the dark path – keep it simple and fun. A lot of girls don’t actually WANT anything serious to happen in the first place.


Just like cuddling, making breakfast can either be fun or can be over the top. We know how to tell the difference at this point, though, so take our word for it. To begin with, if you’re into frying up some eggs because they happen to be there and your girl is hungry, this is safe territory. No harm done here. You’re hungry and you’re eating. No big deal. On the other hand, if the morning after the chick is expecting some elaborate breakfast spread, you are not in a good place. Avoid the eggs and get out the door. If you’re thinking you might want to make her a more complicated meal, then it’s time to reevaluate your own situation.


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